A Celebration of Love

On the first Friday of February, a night of deep-black sky and a rude, coat-clutching chill, my heart was bathed in warm, joy-infused love as I attended my first commitment ceremony.

photo: cancunlover15

This is Nashville. Never. Ever. Ever. Short on musical talent. There's the folks who Made It Big. The folks still Making It Big. The folks who are About To Make it Big. The folks that Want to Make It Big and are Almost There But Not Quite. The folks that perform back-up to the Folks that Made it Big and are Making it Big. And the folks that Never Quite Make it Big because it's awfully dang hard to Make It Big in a City with so much Big Talent.

They were all there that night. Starting with the bag pipe processional with incredible acoustics in this incredible chapel. A female reverend and three other women draped in gorgeous silver and black long shawls, one groomsman sporting a short, gray pony tail topping his black suit, followed by the couple at the end, wearing black suits and red, satin vests and walking hand in hand. As observers, we watched. We listened. We rocked. We soared. We grooved. Our hearts and souls consumed the manna of wisdom and beauty from spiritual traditions of many cultures. Ancient and contemporary poems and scriptures were read in Native American, Gaelic, German and Spanish. The ceremony was an-hour-and-a-half long.

And though no public credit was given, I squeezed one hand of Husband 2.0's, with Grace sitting ever-so patiently in between us, and knew that we were there Friday night observing two life partners honor their 11-year commitment in this public ceremony because one of them had married us last July. Our friend and minister had said that until it became legal in this Buckle of the Bible Belt for a gay couple to say "I do," he'd waste no time on a ceremony for his un-legalized union. But, preparing our ceremony, he came to think differently. It was time to publicly honor his own union.

Here is what my friend wrote on the back of their 8x10 four-page program (italics and underlining mine): "While we know we are 'preaching to the choir,' it can't go unsaid that after this celebration of love, we will not be receiving the more than 1,100 federal rights and protections afforded married couples. These rights and protections include such important opportunities as filing our taxes jointly, receiving each other's pensions or inheritance without an enormous tax penalty; taking unpaid leave to care for one another should we become sick or injured and receiving spousal or surviving spouse benefits under Social Security. They are not special rights. Granting these valuable protections and privileges to same-sex couples does not undermine anyone else's relationship...."

It was a joyous and love-filled occasion to know that 250 of us filled the chapel to supported our friends' earnest partnership.The reception following was simple but perfect. Beve, a super-cool mobile coffee shop, served up the most perfect hot beverages.  And, double shout out to the Flourgirls who baked TEN cakes of every flavor that could please any sugar-lovin' pallate and for doing the right thing after a previous vendor refused the couple's business to "make a stand against two consenting men choosing to commit their love and lives to each other."

Times, they are a'changin. But not without resistance. Too often cloaked in prejudice, ignorance and misguided religiosity. Once again I'm reminded of Eckart Tolle's words in A New Earth. I paraphrase: as we journey into the next portal, there will be great resistance to keep things the same, status quo....

We see this in Politics. In Religion. Inssues of Race. And, in matters related to Equality.

Once again, as in all these matters, including disAbility, I'm reminded:

We. Are. ALL. ONE.

And so it is....

Comments

[Leisa A. Hammett]

Nancy: I know you are/will be an agent for change. Thank you for commenting.

[Leisa A. Hammett]

Absolutely, Gregory. Absolutely. The diversity was stunning & once again, warmed my heart.

[Gregory Fisher]

Thanks, my dear. Having you, Dee and our beloved Grace with us was very special indeed. The evening was about our love and commitment, but, as evidenced by the 32 people who participated in the service as a singer, musician, minister, reader or attendant, it was really about community. Hey folks, it's all we've got! Creating a space where, for one shining moment, everyone was welcome and all were loved was the goal. I think we made it!

[Nancy VanReece]

I just did our taxes today... for the 23rd year in a row - checking SINGLE on a form still sets me off.

[Leisa A. Hammett]

Thanks, Charlotte.

[Charlotte Rains Dixon]

Fantastic post, Leisa. As a sometime officiant at wedding ceremonies, I loved reading this. I live in one of the most liberal bastions of the country, Portland, and there are still plenty of folks who don't think gay marriage should be legal. I think its ridiculous that its not.